Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Take it to the limit...

I hate summer.

So why does the spring, with all the impending summer season it implies, turn me into an overachiever? I got up this morning, did yoga, did a load of laundry and dishes, worked on the computer a while, went shopping, just got back from a 3 mile walk, and tonight there's still class and the potential for social plans after that.

I'm insane.

Sunday, March 27, 2005

A Long Week's Journey Into Night

This is absolutely inhumane.

I'm talking about what's happening to Terri Schiavo. As of this writing, she has been off her feeding tube for eight days and her family members are starting to admit the lack of nourishment is taking its toll.

Let's forget, for just a moment, all the legal wranglings, and Congressional attempts at intervention and everything else outside that hospice room. In the end, which her family says is near, this comes down to a woman who can't feed herself, being starved to death. Doctors say she can't feel it, but she can't speak for herself, so we don't truly know. It's illegal for doctors to administer drugs to kill her, because that would be murder, or assisted suicide. But it's okay to let her wither away without food because that's a "natural" death since she chose to refuse it.

In a case like this, I can't help but wonder why a medical coma is not an option. It would neither prolong her life nor hasten her demise, but if, as her family says is true, she CAN feel and is TRYING to communicate, then they would know for sure that she at least felt no pain as her last wishes were carried out.

There is so much more to be said here, but I'll bite it off one bite at a time. Perhaps I'll tackle the legalities or the ethics of it all a little later in the week.

Saturday, March 19, 2005

Susan Sarandon Does It Again

So I watched the end of Shall We Dance this morning. I've seen the original, and the remake was so lackluster that it's taken me a good two weeks to slog though it. But there was one passage that wasn't in the Japanese version that really made me sit up and take notice.

I've been struggling for more than a year now with the importance of marriage and why I care so much about it. I think I've found the tip of the iceberg (of course, it was in a pretty blase movie buried in a story line that never truly developed, but that's why it's a hidden nugget) in something Susan Sarandon had to say:

"I'm not a romantic, I'm a realist. Why do people get married? We need a witness to our lives. There's a billion people on this planet... I mean, what does any one life really mean? But, in a marriage, you are promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things, all of it, all the time, every day. You're saying, 'Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go unwitnessed because I will be your witness.'"

That makes sense. Maybe that's what I've been looking to put into words all this time. It's not the physical security or the financial security, but the emotional security - the promise that someone will care.

Can I have a witness?

Thursday, March 17, 2005

Luck o' the Irish

Happy St. Patrick's Day everyone. Raise your glass of green beer or Guinness in a toast -

May you be in Heaven half an hour before the devil knows you're dead!

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

Crazy nights

I'm wondering what the moon's up to these days, cause everyone I know, or so it seems, is having crazy nights. Computers crashing, phones ringing, strange emotions, and strange dreams are all just the tip of the iceberg. Just last night, one friend's computer crashed. Another got a call from an ex she hadn't heard from in years. A third felt this unexplainable need to call his ex's mom (but called me instead, thank goodness!). Anyone else having some weird evenings of late?

And then there are the dreams. I had a strange one last night that I was buying a house, and my realtor took me to one that turned out to be the one my ex just sold, but I didn't find that out until after I had bought it. So then he came to town with another man I've never met, just to pick up the towels that were still in the bathroom, and drove all over the town we used to live in, overtly taunting me, yet refusing to speak to me.

We finally went to a restaurant for lunch, but he wouldn't get out of his truck. When he did, he kept changing. One moment I'd look at him and he'd be himself, the next time I'd look at him and he was someone I know now. Back and forth until I woke up. Odd, but not nearly as unsettling as one another friend had last night.

Hopefully, the Moon is having fun toying with us humans and will tire of the game soon.

Sunday, March 13, 2005

Back to your regularly scheduled blogging

Wow, I've been slack lately. Between illness, work, basketball, and my fledgling social life, I've had plenty to say and no energy to post it. Or time for that matter. Or motivation, seeing as how I usually use this space to pose rhetorical questions and random thoughts, but lately I've actually had a chance to discussing those random thoughts in my real life and not just in well-reasoned online arguments. It's kinda nice.

Anyway, I'm back.

Saturday, March 05, 2005

Change the Channel

Aack! I can't get a song out of my head....it's been stuck there for the last three days! I don't even want to say which one because I'm afraid I'll read this later when it posts and start it up again.

Please, for the sake of my sanity, suggest something better that will free up the use of my grey matter!

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

It's all relative

You think you're smart, until you meet someone who's intelligent. You think you're good, until you meet someone who's better. You think you're all that until you meet the bag of chips.

I've met my bag of chips.

How you react to that tells you and everyone who's paying attention a lot about you as a person. For me, honestly, it's been a long time since I've been intimidated by anyone I've met. Usually I'm secure in the knowledge of who I am, the work I do, and the intelligence I have at my command. However, Mr. Chips has shaken that foundation a bit.

I know a little about a lot of things, and how to learn more. One of the things I've always felt I knew a lot about was music. But his knowledge rivals anyone I've ever met. Not only does he have the talent to create music, but the brainpower to dissect that music into the math behind its components and use that knowledge to create more music. I find that mesmerizing.

I have a friend whose ex always said she didn't think she could marry him because she wasn't smart enough to be a professor's wife. I never understood that sentiment - after all, it's the professor who gets paid to teach and carry out research and scholarly discourse. Now, for the first time, I feel a tad bit of empathy. I don't know if I'll ever feel quite right offering up an opinion on music around Mr. Chips, out of respect for his abilities, but I can't wait to hear what he does next.

Tuesday, March 01, 2005

Let the Sun Shine...

An interesting health tidbit from the Old Country:

Nordic Nations Call for Limits on Tanning Beds

Makes sense - pale skin + real sun= disaster, so why tempt fate with the fake bake?